Newlyweds in the fifties had not heard about setting boundaries in relationships. When we married in 1955, we lived in a garage apartment within walking distance of the university where I was taking summer classes. My husband took a job as a roustabout for an oil company to support us until his teaching job began in the fall. Every day he took his lunch in a black domed top lunch box typical at that time. We soon established a routine. He immediately showered when he came home from work while I finished preparing supper. Part of my routine also included cleaning his lunch box and getting it ready for the next day.
One of his favorites for lunch was what he called fried pies. I thought that he was expecting too much if he thought that I was going to make fried pies every day. He explained that his mother made them and that they were not the traditional fruit filled fried pies. She told me how to make them. I soon mastered the simple process of rolling biscuit dough very thin, putting some cinnamon sugar dotted with butter in the center, folding the dough over and crimping the edges like the traditional pies. I then browned them on both sides in butter. These were simple to make and kept well in the lunch box in the Texas heat.
One day after finishing his lunch, he glanced over at a pile of sand. On impulse, he filled his lunch box with sand and closed it. That afternoon he came home, set his lunch box on the kitchen table and proceeded to the shower. When I opened the lunch box to clean, I was surprised to say the least. I dumped the sand in the trash, washed out the lunch box, and finished preparing our meal.
During the meal and all during the evening, neither of us said a word about the sand. The next morning as he left for work he picked up his lunch box with the usual lunch. At lunch time he finished his sandwiches and started on a fried pie. He had taken a big bite of a pie before he realized that it was made with salt instead of sugar.
Again, nothing was said about sand or salt as each of us waited for the other to be the first to say something. Several years passed and both of us forgot about the incident. One evening we were with friends sharing early marriage experiences when he told about it. It has now been added to the family lore and gives our children and grandchildren a good laugh.
In those days it was called getting even.
Comments
9 responses to “Newlywed Boundaries”
I REMEBER THE DAIRY BARN AND PROCESSING BARN. I HAD THE PLEASURE OF “WORKING” IN BOTH WHEN I WOULD COME TO SEE YOU IN THE SUMMER. BOTTLEING THE MILK WAS MY FAVORITE JOB. I ALSO ENJOYED DELIVERING THE MILK WITH YOUR FATHER. HE TAUGHT ME HOW TO DRIVE THE FORD PANEL TRUCK HE USED. AS A CITY BOY, I LEARNED A LOT OUT ON THE FARM FROM YOUR DAD AND BROTHER. CUZ
Thanks for subscribing. I am going to be picking your brain for input from time to time.
I REMEMBER WARD SCHOOL ALSO. BEING FROM OUT OF TOWN I THOUGHT IT A FUNNY NAME FOR A SCHOOL. CUZ
I saw nothing unusual about it back then, and you never mentioned that you thought it was a funny name. You were
a tactful little boy I guess.
I LIKED THOSE FRIED PIES ALSO. MOTHR WOULD MAKE FRIED PIES EVER SO OFTEN WITH SOME KIND OF FRUIT. THEN SHE WOULD MAKE MY BROTHER AND I PIES LIKE YOU DID. MOTHER CALLED HER PIES ‘poor man’s pie” you have a lucky husband.
Please tell him how lucky he is!
Gonna see how my hubby likes “Ken and Charley’s fried pies”… 🙂 Mmmmmmmm..
Gonna see how my hubby likes “Ken and Charley’s fried pies”… 🙂 Mmmmmm mom…
I hope he likes them. They are easy to make but I have not made them in many, many years (like 50??).